People call me ”Zu, ” but my parents named me Zuwena Trinity Ramirez, and this is my story.
I was four years old when my mother died. It was very hard for both me and my father since my mom was the backbone of our family. My father was the one most affected. After my mothers death, he started drinking excessively and became a man whore. Every weekend, there was a house party or a pool party at our house. Mostly during the weekdays, his friend would come over and spend the night at our house. My father wasn in his right state of mind all the time. He sent me to the boarding school in South Tanu on my sixth birthday, which was very hurtful to me as the only parent I was left with was just getting rid of me.
On my seventeenth birthday, I came home for the Christmas holiday after a long thirteen years without seeing my father. I landed at the airport, and my sisters mother was there waiting for me. She is the sweetest, most understanding aunt anyone could ask for. With a beautiful smile, she hugged me. At that moment, I felt like crying, but I didn . I had to be strong and avoid crying in front of everybody at the airport.
I sat with my aunt in the car. Nobody said anything. The ride to my house was somehow the longest ride I ever had. Upon reaching the driveway, my aunt held my hands and told me to be strong and to call her anytime if I needed anything. Getting out of her car, I went directly to the house, where I met a maid at the door, opening the door for me. I greeted her and went directly to my room. I wanted to take a shower and sleep.
As I was about to enter my old room, somebody cleared her throat, which forced me to turn and look back. I turned around quickly and my eyes met a blonde woman with blue eyes. ”And what are you doing in my house? ” she asked. ”Look, I only want to sleep right now. ” Please excuse me. That is what I said. As I was trying to get to my room, the blonde lady started pulling my hair out. As she started calling my dads name, ”Peter, Peter dear, come here and throw this trash out of our house. ” My father came running as Blondie yelled his name, and when he saw me, he just froze in his truck and asked me what I was doing there, which surprised me because he never visited me when I was in the boarding school in South Tuna. As I was starting to explain myself, he simply said, ”Make sure to return to where you came from the first thing in the morning. ” I said nothing.
Sitting on my bed trying very hard not to breakdown since this has been my daily routine, to survive this kind of life one has to be strong, In the morning, I will call my aunt and go to live with her since my dad and his wife do not need me here. After getting out of the shower, I get into bed directly.
After a few hours,……….
The next thing I knew, I was woken up by my father telling me to pack my things and get out of his house as his wife did not want me in their house. I was surprised at first, but I did as I was told. As I was trying to pack my things with tears in my eyes, I tried to call my aunt, but her phone was off. I had no one to help me at the time, so I had no choice but to figure it out for myself; as usual, I had no money on me, and I was hopeless and dumb. I was tired of living this sorry life and I took the matter into my own hand and decided to put a full stop to this suffering. I stopped everything I was doing and ran out of my childhood home in the rain, crying. Not knowing where to go, I ran and ran until I reached the waterfall, which is at the end of the forest near my childhood community area.
I stood there, preparing myself to jump. I really wanted to end my life. As I was jumping, someone jumped out of nowhere and moved me away from the waterfall. I found myself in the arms of a stranger. He let me down. I tried again to run to the fall, but he stopped me once again. What are you doing? He asked with an annoyed voice. The pain of losing my mother at such a young age, my fathers negligence, and my mothers side of the familys betrayal all came directly and cried, and he held me in his arms and rubbed my back as I cried. He did not ask any questions, he allowed me to wet his shirt and he did not complain.
After letting everything out, he allowed me to sit on the ground. We sat down together, and nobody said anything, but it was not awkward, it was just a peaceful silence as each one of us was busy in his or her own world.
After a few minutes, I started the conversation by telling him all my life stories. I don know what came over me, but I felt at ease talking to him. He was very attentive as I was speaking, and he did not interrupt me when I was talking. He did not judge me. He reached out to his pockets and gave me a piece of cloth to wipe my nose. As I was weeping and my nose was not in good condition as they were running, I tried to peek at his face. I did not see his face as I was busy trying to commit suicide and crying. As I raised my face to look at him, I was shocked to find him looking at me. A beautiful smile found its way onto his lips, and my eyes were blinded by the glinting white teeth. I quickly looked away, embarrassed, but I still wanted to look at him. I tried to hide my face as I was embarrassed, but he stopped me.
Do not do that ever again, he said, as I looked at him confused. Do not hide from me, you are beautiful, he said, after sensing my confusion. You have been thought a lot but do not let that get to you. You are still young, you still have a life ahead of you. You need to be strong and live for your mothers sake. I don think she will be pleased to see you kill yourself. You have to be strong and keep moving. If you can do it for yourself, do it for your mother. He said calmly.
He offered me his jacket, which I, of course, refused to accept, and he persisted, as we sat there quietly, reflecting over what he had said and him keeping me company and waiting for me to think these things through.
I made my departure after a brief while, but as I was about to take my next stride, I felt a hand on my shoulder, causing me to come to a halt and turn around. ”What are you doing? ” he inquired.
I don know if it was the only thing I answered, and without saying anything else, he grabbed my tiny hand in his enormous one and led the way; I had no clue where he was taking me; however, with him, I felt peaceful and at ease as Id never felt before; just with him, I felt safe from harm.
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